In which Travis McElroy of MBMBaM and other fine podcasts 1) expresses feelings similar to my own about the election; 2) makes me feel slightly better; 3) also makes me cry a lot.
I also typed it all out, for those (like me) who prefer reading to listening (although I recommend listening, as I found Travis’s voice and delivery very comforting):
Good morning.
If you’re like me, you woke up this morning feeling lost - feeling unsure of what the future holds. There are probably some of you out there that woke up this morning feeling justifiably terrified.
Last night, we suffered a loss. And I don’t mean the election - I don’t mean that we lost the race. I feel - and I don’t want to speak for you - but I woke up this morning feeling like I had lost someone, or something, very precious to me. I felt like I had woken up this morning, and that feeling that I always fell back to, when I worried about what was happening in the country, this feeling of no matter how bad or how scary it got, that, at its core, America was still kind, it was still good - it was just scared. And I think a lot of us were relying on that in the election season - that, yes, things were scary, and yes, there was a potential for things to break very bad, but at the end of the day, people are good and good things would happen. And that is not how it played out.
And - the only comfort I can give you is I’ve lost people before, and the morning after a loss like that, you wake up and you just don’t know how you’re going to put one foot in front of the other. You don’t know how you’re going to keep moving forward, because there just seems like so much ahead of you, so much negative time that you’re going to have to wade through. But the answer is - one step at a time. Just take it moment by moment.
And you know what? I’m not going to sit here and tell you that everything is going to be okay - I thought about doing that, but at the end of the day, I don’t know. There’s a lot to be scared of - especially if you are not, like me, a straight white cisgender male, there’s a lot to be afraid of. And there’s a lot of bad that can happen, and a lot of hurt, and a lot of cruelty that can happen. So I’m not going to sit here and tell you everything’s gonna be okay.
But I will tell you that I will be there. I don’t know how much I can do - I don’t know how much I can help, but you’re not alone. And I’m sure that there are other people out there that feel the same way.
Because, as a straight white cisgender male, I’m not under the same direct threats that you are, but that doesn’t mean that I won’t stand beside you - or in front of you, if I can. Because you are my friends, and you are my family, and when my friends and family are threatened, I don’t run away. And I think a lot of people feel that way.
So I think rather than tell you everything’s going to be okay, I think the message I can tell you, with certainty, is that you are not alone. I think it’s perfectly understandable to wake up this morning and feel very alone, and feel like your country and the citizens of your country have betrayed you. And maybe you’re listening to this and you’re not even American and you feel like the world has betrayed you, you feel like America has betrayed you. And I think it’s perfectly justifiable to feel that way.
Not too long ago, on an episode of one of my shows, I got upset at people talking about moving to Canada if Donald Trump won the election, and talking about “that was unpatriotic, and you gotta love your country no matter what,” and that was short-sighted. Last night, around midnight, I definitely understood that feeling. And not because I wanted to flee the country out of fear - while I definitely understand why some people would feel that way, and I think that, I think that that’s justifiable - but, for me, it was more, I was just so disappointed, and I didn’t know how I could go on being a part of a country that would endorse such vile hatred.
So - I don’t know what the future holds. I don’t know what the next month holds, the next week, the next day, the next four years. But - you know, when I get really anxious, really scared, really nervous, I hold Teresa’s hand, and just knowing that there is another human being, that there is the warmth, the contact, it makes me feel better. And I imagine that some of you out there don’t have the luxury of that, don’t have someone’s hand to hold. So just know that, wherever you are and whoever you are, I am holding your hand. I’m with you. Anything I can do to help, let me know.
And the only piece of advice I can give is that, if you woke up this morning like me, feeling just lost and aimless and not sure how to cope with this, the best advice I can give you is - action is the best way to combat that. Now I’m not talking about, like, a letter-writing campaign or running for office in your home state - I mean, if you want to do those things, by all means, I heavily endorse you doing that. I just mean - maybe this is a good time to tell someone you love them, or go on social media and say something nice, or just do something nice for yourself. You know, go to your favorite restaurant and have your favorite meal and just don’t think about this for a couple of minutes. Or, you know, just sit down and watch your favorite movie, or, you know, let yourself take a nap. Or - let yourself worry about it. Don’t try to stop - don’t stop yourself from experiencing it. Maybe that’s the action you need, is you need to work through it. Feel. Do. Think. Move. Whatever you need to do to take it one step at a time. And just know that you’re not alone.
I love you very much, and I look forward to tomorrow.
contemplative
hoping
energetic
inspired
cheerful
motivated
calm